Park Bench, Bus Bench
Dan John, one of my mentors in the strength and conditioning world, often uses the ‘Park Bench/Bus Bench’ theory of setting up fitness programs.
The concept is really useful for anything else you might be working on–a skill or hobby, self improvement, mental health, or… your dance.
If you were sitting on a bench waiting for a bus, you expect the bus to get there at a certain time. You have somewhere to be, and want to operate on a schedule. If the bus doesn’t show up or you miss it, you’d likely be frustrated.
On the other hand, if you were going for a walk in the park and sat on a bench there, you might not have anywhere to be for a while. You’re enjoying the day, and the amount of time you’re sitting there isn’t contingent on a strict schedule or plan.
A lot of workout plans are more of the former; and this isn’t a bad thing but often makes them unsustainable in the long term. You might also burn out if you took this approach to lots of other things: it’s all about the goal, you expect to achieve certain things by a certain time, and you view progress as occurring on a timeline that’s, more or less, set in stone.
With West Coast Swing, the nature of the convention/competition circuit brings a lot of dancers into that bus bench mindset. I’m going to go to a certain number of events, and get to the next WSDC level by such and such a time if I can make finals/place/get points at these comps along the way.
Do this for too long, and you’ll end up putting yourself through a lot of mental strain.
The same goes for practice. I’m going to go to all of these socials, practice with all of these people, do a bunch of drills, subscribe to all of these websites and educational platforms… this is great, but can sometimes take some of the joy out of the dance itself. Also it doesn’t help that this is usually tied to the same mindset regarding events, improvement, getting to the next level, and comparing yourself to other people.
What really amps up progress is sustainability.
What really helps your consistency, in terms of how well you dance, is sustainability.
What really aids your mental and emotional well being and helps you be a good member of your community, is… sustainability.
Some of my own worst times were when my process simply wasn’t sustainable. That goes for travel and competition schedules (and the pressure I put on myself), staying in a certain unhealthy mindset, or how I viewed my own practice and progress even outside of the competition realm.
“Enjoy the journey” or “focus on the process” or “it isn’t all about the destination” or “stop comparing yourself to other people” – these are cliches for a reason and much easier to say than to do.
Here’s the ironic little carrot, though.
Spend more time on that park bench and you’ll make much more progress in the long run. You’ll also be much happier. Taking your foot off the proverbial gas pedal – and still being productive – is the key. You’re still outside sitting on a bench, you’re not curled up in your closet hating yourself, your dance and everyone around you. It just isn’t the bus bench, at least not most of the time.
In a lot of strength training programs, we’ll see clients push push push, get injured or otherwise burn out, take a bunch of time off doing nothing and getting detrained and unhealthy; then become super motivated and once again push push push, get injured, and repeat.
A lot of dancers are the same. Hell, even if you look at the very highest tier of professionals, the ones who have been consistent at 30-40 events per year for many, many years in a row have figured out how to do it sustainably. But even people who don’t often go to events and only dance locally often go through ups and downs from an emotional roller coaster they put themselves on, when it comes to taking classes and privates and practicing and going to every social and comparing their progress to the next person over.
Maybe 80-20 is a good place to start. That is, 80% of the time park bench, 20% of the time bus bench.
So, what would a park bench type of dance lifestyle look like? It will vary from person to person, but we can look at a number of different aspects of our dance experience to make it more sustainable.
Using less effort overall:
-Fewer long practices and more small daily routines.
-Not staying out super late at socials, if this makes you tired.
-Not forcing yourself to go dance because you 'should' if you don't want to in the moment.
Working on your own healthy head space:
-Working on a growth mindset
-Staying present during your time dancing rather than worrying about the future
-Comparing yourself to others less, etc.
(Yes, all of this is very much easier said than done)
work on a healthier self image
practice better with your partners
foster a growth mindset around dancing with other humans
Social battery/network:
-Not feeling compelled to always say yes (especially to people who are uncomfortable to dance with, or rude/impolite)
-Spending more time with and around people who make you feel good and support you rather than worrying about anyone else
-Not people pleasing/trying to measure how much people like dancing with you, or measuring your self worth based on the experience you think you're providing
Compartmentalization:
-Thinking less about dance when you aren't actively doing it, perhaps spending less time on social media
-Taking time to acknowledge negative feelings or worries that come up, but doing so very deliberately in a pre planned space (journaling about it, for example)
-Having other things in your life that you're working on--not having just one obsession that ends up with your personal value attached to it is a good idea
Emphasize the positive:
What actually makes you happy? Be aware of this and take a bit of effort to keep these things in mind. For example, if your focus is social dancing, why are you spending a ton of effort on styling and personal aesthetics? Work on connection and things like your own weight transfers and body engagement when it comes to personal movement. Work on skills that will result in you enjoying your dances more, in general, with a broader variety of people.
And, be smart about how you develop these skills.
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